Cowboys "Commissioner" Williams fines teammates for errors

As the Cowboys wrap up their second week of training camp at the Alamodome, one aspect of the game that has really pleased the coaches is that the offense has been taking care of the football. There haven't been many fumbles or interceptions and there's a reason for that. Those kinds of blunders are hitting them in the pocket book.

We're talking about fines, that always seems to speak the loudest. The Cowboys had 33 turnovers last year, the most since 2004 when the Bill Parcells led team went 6-10. So in an effort to nip that in the bud...the receivers are leading the way by laying down the law and taking in the cash.

During a routine passing route at training camp, while nearly everybody in the stands is watching the play, the coaches behind the line of scrimmage are looking for something else, any sign of the football.

"You get in trouble if they can see the ball from the back" said receiver Sam Hurd. "Instead of going to the meetings and getting yelled at over and over, you try to do it right. Everybody is doing it right and everybody is holding it across their chest so we're working on a lot of ball security" Hurd said.

Part of their financial security also depends on it.  Miles Austin knows all too well.

"Receivers have fines for mental errors, missed assignments, failing to convert on a route
if you block the wrong guy.  It all adds up" Austin said.  But there is a way to cancel out some of the fines.  ""Get a touchdown, the more you get the more you can mess up."

Of course, that defeats the purpose.  Who is keeping track of all these errors anyway? It's none other than Roy Williams who instituted the system and named himself "Commissioner." Roy adds up the errors as he sees them, writes them on his hand or on receiver coach Ray Sherman's play sheet.

Maybe that's why Roy Williams keeps changing his jersey from 4 to 11 and back to 4, in an attempt to stay anonymous but instead, he's become, notorious.

"He's worse then Goodell" said receiver Patrick Crayton.  "He tries to rule with an iron fist, and it's been bad, very biased, it's been ridiculous so far" Crayton said with a smirk on his face.

Shaking his head, Crayton said, "he writes it down on Coach Sherman's play sheet to keep track but he never writes things about himself. It's always something else when it comes to him.  We don't worry we've got it on film, we make sure to mark it down but he's corrupt!"

Roy's response: "They think I'm a little biased toward myself but when you're commissioner you can do that."

When I told him that Crayton said he was corrupt, Roy promised retaliation.

"Well you know he's the Vice President so he thinks he's second in command" Williams said. "I'm going to fire him because he's given leeway to too many guys."

Williams continued the light hearted barbs claiming that he has fined himself $110 so far.  In the twelve days of training camp the receiving corps has racked up $960 dollars in fines and they're only halfway through camp.  The receivers who make the team all plan to spend the proceeds dining out in Dallas when camp breaks.

The receivers have set a little trend with their kangaroo court, now the kickers are getting into the act, but they're focusing on making it more of a hazing for rookie kickoff specialist David Buehler.  He hasn't done anything wrong in the kicking department but his fellow specalists have had to find a way to shrink his ego

"We're doing fines" said punter Mat McBriar.  "He's a rockstar, this rookie from USC, Mr. Hollywood, he's over there yelling to the crowd.  We see him doing stupid things so we fine him for that"  said McBriar in his thick Australian accent.

Buehler has taken it all in stride.  "I mean hey, you gotta become a fan favorite quick" Buehler said.  "So you gotta make a good first impression quick get the fans on your side, I'm doing all I can!"

Having fun at camp is a must or the or the repetition of the routine will drive you crazy. The Cowboys will go hard here again on Monday  with the last two a day of the week. There is one practice Tuesday, a walk through on Wednesday and then it's game on with the kickoff of the first pre-season game on Thursday night in Oakland against the Raiders.  

Be sure to tune in to Inside Sports tonight at 9:30pm for more Cowboys coverage.